One in five marriages in the US is between people of different ethnicities, and 5% of those involve a mail-order bride. The practice that emerged in the 17th century to help new American settlements survive has gained popularity with the rise of globalization, travel, and technology.
Where in the days of Yore, men had to place newspaper ads and wait months for their brides to cross the Atlantic, now international dating sites make it easy and fast to find and order a bride. Let’s learn more about the inner workings of this industry together.
5 Best Mail Order Brides & Dating Sites in 2024
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Introduction to the concept of mail order brides: Where are we now?
Around 200,000 single women globally are aspiring to become mail-order brides for American, Canadian, and European men. And the trend has been growing over the past decades. For example, in 2007, an estimated 16,000 foreign brides married US citizens, and nearly 25,000 ladies entered America in 2022 using K-1 fiance visas. And the number was even higher in 2019, before the pandemic, as over 41,000 foreigners received fiance visas to come to the US.
Of course, there’s no way to tell how many of the foreign brides actually got married to Americans after coming to the US. However, we can also cite recent studies demonstrating the highest-ever acceptance rate of interracial marriage, which reached 94% in 2021.
Considering the steady rise of intermarriage brought it to over 17% in 2017, we can safely assume that Americans are getting more excited about and accepting interracial and international couples. Therefore, looking for a wife abroad is becoming less of a curiosity and more of a mainstream trend.
What motivates women to become mail order brides?
Generalizations cannot do justice to mail-ordered wives’ motivation to leave their homelands behind and seek love across borders.
Still, based on our research, the four major drivers include the following:
- Dangerous and oppressive environments. Women are often desperate to flee countries with authoritarian governments and high crime rates, like Bolivia, Russia, or Belarus, and becoming online brides gives them a chance to find a better life abroad.
- Low socio-economic status. The wage gap exceeds 20% even in some of the most prosperous countries, like South Korea and Japan, so women expect to have better chances of making a living in the US.
- Stifling gender stereotypes. Conservative and religious societies expect women to get married before 18, give birth to half a dozen babies, and take care of household chores. An international marriage gives an out to women who wish to break the mold.
- Lacking local males. When women find local guys lacking in respect, affection, or financial stability, they seek partners abroad.
For many women, two or more of these reasons combine to create an untenable situation that spurs them into action looking for a foreign husband.
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History and evolution of the mail order bride industry
Before we delve further into the dynamics of looking for a bride abroad, let’s take a short detour and see how the mail-order bride industry emerged and evolved over the last four centuries:
- 1600s and 1700s. The first mail-order brides came to Virginia in 1619 to help settlers develop a stable colony. The French orphan girls known as The Filles du Roi (King’s daughters) came to Canada in the middle of the 17th century for the same purpose. In contrast, Louisiana enforced immigration, as few women were willing to risk their lives coming to the dangerous colony.
- 1800s. In 1849, Eliza Farnham published a newspaper ad seeking women interested in moving West to become the wives of Californians swept by the gold rush. Matrimonial newspaper advertisements became quite popular before the Civil War, as they helped potential spouses get to know each other better before meeting in person.
- 1900s. Popular at the beginning of the 20th century, local and international mail-order marriages petered out by the 1950s. Moreover, as foreign brides dominated the industry, the attitude toward interracial marriage turned hostile.
- 2000s. The turn of the millennium saw the revival of the international mail-order bride industry, and the number of K-1 fiance visas kept growing before the pandemic.
So not only are mail order brides a staple of American culture, but they were an integral part of the early success of the US. It’s no wonder their popularity always surges after occasional dips.
Pros and cons of mail-order bride relationships
Developing realistic expectations is crucially important, especially when it comes to such serious decisions as the decision to find a mail-order bride and marry her. International relationships definitely have their advantages, but starting them makes sense only if you consider the drawbacks, too.
- Opportunity to meet a family- and marriage-minded person through mail-order bride services
- Advanced features of mail-order bride websites allow people to build deep emotional connections before they meet in real life
- Opportunity to find a partner from another country who’d share your views on life and family and has similar values
- A shorter dating period before marriage
- Higher success rates compared to traditional marriages
- High motivation of mail-order brides to build healthy and happy relationships; their devotion to partners and family
- Language and cultural barriers
- The long-distance relationship phase is inevitable
- Things won’t work if you choose a poor-quality mail-order bride service
- Trips to another country may be expensive
- Visa application process lasts long and isn’t simple
Basically, the question is whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages for you personally. If yes, you need to develop a good strategy that will allow you to avoid all potential pitfalls and difficulties and find a mail-order bride in the near future and at a reasonable price.
5 top countries for finding mail-order brides
There are 15+ countries where men can find thousands of mail-order brides, but most find love in the following places.
1. The Philippines
Filipina mail-order brides are legendary—for centuries, local women have migrated to another country to get married, and the “demand” for local wives has been steadily high. Researchers confirm that the primary reason for migration is the desire to start a family, as marriage is seen as an important aspect of social fulfillment.
In 2022, nearly 5,000 Filipinas entered the US to marry their partners, and most American men, along with men from other Western countries, note that the main reasons why their relationships with Filipinas are that satisfying are:
- Their family-mindedness and devotion to a relationship
- Loyalty and willingness to compromise
- Ability to express love through care and attention
- Zest for work
- Friendliness, ability to assimilate into a new culture easily
Nearly any Asian mail-order bride site has members from the Philippines, so finding a perfect match in this country won’t be a complex task.
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2. Ukraine
Ukrainian mail-order brides are the most popular Eastern European women in the international online dating market. In 2022, there were around 5,000 marriage migrants to the US, which can be explained by political reasons. For example, in 2019, there were around 800 K-1 visa applicants from Ukraine.
The motivation of foreign men who marry Ukrainian brides is mostly explained by the following facts about local women:
- They’re naturally beautiful, educated, and ambitious
- Ukrainian women believe family is the most important thing in life
- They may be brutally honest, but it actually makes the relationship last
- A lot of them speak English and are into Western culture
You can meet Ukrainian girls on any top online dating site, but consider that you’ll need to meet your Ukrainian girlfriend in a third country because of safety reasons.
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3. Vietnam
Vietnam has recently become one of the most mainstream countries for finding a bride. Around 600 marriage migrants yearly go to the US alone to start families with Americans, and such popularity is explained by the following facts:
- The highest level of friendliness among all the Asian countries
- Women’s attraction to foreign men (explained by multiple reasons, including curiosity and positive stereotypes)
- Talent for hard work (Vietnamese society is rather matriarchal but not always in a positive sense)
- Inner and outer beauty of local girls
Vietnam is the best recent discovery for international daters, and more and more mail-order bride sites are starting advertising campaigns to attract members from this particular country.
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4. Mexico
Men looking for Latin American brides often choose Mexico as the destination country. It’s explained not only by the geographical closeness to the United States but also by high cultural compatibility. Over 1,200 people applied for K-1 visas in 2022, and this number is only expected to grow.
Marriages with Mexican brides work because of the following peculiarities:
- Mexican women value mutual support and believe it is one of the things that keeps the family together
- Spontaneity, kindness, and friendliness are some of the most common family characteristics
- Whatever happens, they remain optimistic
- Most local girls like the improved version of the traditional family with more respect but the same level of attachment
Finding a Mexican woman seems to be a win-win option for many men, especially Americans. One can easily find a perfect match online after joining one of the niche mail-order bride sites.
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5. Thailand
Thai brides are also some of the most popular Asian mail-order brides. Though the number of marriage migrants isn’t that impressive compared to the Philippines or even Vietnam (there were 300+ K-1 visa applicants in 2022), thousands of men worldwide choose Thai women for the following reasons:
- They’re gentle, compliant, and caring
- They’re reserved, a bit discreet, and non-confrontational, which reduces the number of potential conflicts
- Thai women are open and trustworthy
- Local girls have strong motivation to start a family but believe that it will work only if they choose a decent partner
- They’re often more educated than local men and are searching for an equal partner
Thailand isn’t about bar girls. Thailand is about family-minded women who have a lot to offer to a man.
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Understanding the mail-order bride costs involved
There’s no way to buy a mail-order bride—a man can only find a foreign woman using a mail-order bride site, start a relationship with her, meet her in real life, and then, if they both believe it’s a perfect match, marry the woman.
In other words, there’s no fixed price for a bride, but you’ll still need to spend money. We’re going to explain what the major mail-order bride costs are and calculate the total cost of finding a wife in the example of the Philippines.
Factors affecting mail-order bride costs
First, let’s analyze the main expenses the total cost is made up of.
As you can see, there are a lot of factors to consider, but if you plan things instead of making emotional decisions, you’re more likely to avoid extra costs.
Calculating mail-order bride costs in the example of the Philippines
Let’s say you’re going to find a wife in the Philippines. In this case, the minimum costs will be as follows:
- Online dating services—approximately $600 for six months of using the site
- Round-trip tickets to the Philippines—$1,200
- Three-week stay in the Philippines (hotel, entertainment, food, transportation)—$2,100
- K-1 visa to the US—$1,000
- Optional expenses (gifts, wedding)—$1,000+
- Total—around $6,000
The price can be higher or a bit lower depending on your choices and preferences.
Tips to manage the budget—Meet mail-order wives at a reasonable price
If you want to cut costs, follow these simple recommendations:
- Choose an online dating site with a reasonable pricing policy.
- Focus on women who meet your criteria; don’t try to contact all the attractive ladies.
- If you see any red flags, at least the tiniest ones, move on instead of spending money on communication with the wrong person.
- Choose the right time for flights when you decide to meet the woman in real life. Don’t go to the bride’s country during the hot season.
- Don’t be afraid to make serious decisions. Living in two countries or going to another continent too frequently will cost you a fortune.
Generally speaking, you should try to be rational at every stage of your journey.
Crucially important questions about foreign brides & answers that explain everything
Myths, misconceptions, stereotypes—all these things negatively affect the mail-order bride industry. It’s definitely not perfect, but if you’re considering joining an online dating site to meet foreign brides, you need to know how things work in reality, and we answer all the most important questions below.
❓ Do mail-order brides still exist?
Yes, they do. It may seem that there are not so many mail-order brides as in the ’90s—the time when the industry was on the rise. In reality, the number of foreign women looking for husbands from the US, Canada, Australia, Japan, and countries of Western Europe is growing. We can see that not only from analytics of mail-order bride sites but also from fiance(e) visa reports.
The only reason why people think that mail-order brides are gone is because men don’t choose wives from catalogs anymore and don’t have to search for a land-based mail-order bride agency. Today, it’s more like regular online dating—people meet on dating sites, build authentic relationships, and then meet in real life.
❓ What percentage of mail-order brides stay married?
Around 40% of mail-order bride marriages end in divorce. It may seem that 60% of successful marriages isn’t a very impressive rate, but it’s still higher than the rate for traditional couples, nearly 50% of which get divorced over time.
❓ Are mail-order brides a form of human trafficking?
No, they are not. Unlike human trafficking, the mail-order bride business doesn’t involve force, fraud, or coercion. On top of that, a mail-order bride doesn’t receive compensation and isn’t made to believe that she will receive it—a foreign woman you can meet on a niche online dating website is motivated only by her desire to meet a foreign man and start a family.
She isn’t forced to get married or even stay with her now-husband. Moreover, the law protects foreign women even after they arrive in the country and face domestic violence or any kind of abuse.
The dynamics of finding mail order brides: How it works and what to expect
The process of getting a bride by mail hasn’t changed much over the last 400 years, though technological advances make it easier than ever.
The process follows a few simple steps:
Choose a matrimonial destination (country or region) based on your preferences.
Research and pick a niche dating site specializing in your chosen region.
Sign up and create a dating profile with attractive photos and a compelling bio.
Search for the best foreign brides using filters or matching tools like swiping.
Use communication tools, like live chat, video calls, etc., to get to know each other.
Agree on an appropriate time and place for an in-person meeting to gauge your compatibility.
Arrange the bride’s move to the US and get married.
And we’ll be happy to share the specifics and best practices for each of these stages to improve your chances with wives for sale.
The legal framework: Understanding the laws surrounding mail order bride arrangements
First, you cannot actually buy a wife. That would be human trafficking and 100% illegal. Instead, you can use dating services to find and date a foreign girl.
American government realizes the growing popularity of mail-order brides and aims to protect the women coming to America using two major legislations:
- International Marriage Broker Regulation Act of 2005 (IMBRA). The Act regulates the operation of international marriage brokers and governs international marriage practices. For example, dating sites are prohibited from sharing images and personal information of people under 18. At the same time, Americans interested in marrying foreigners must disclose their criminal history. And they can only file for two K-1 visas with a break of at least two years between them.
- Violence Against Women Act (VAWA). The Act has gone through multiple iterations, but its primary goal is to protect women, including mail order brides, from domestic abuse. However, the latest version also aims to protect the victims of cyber abuse and bullying.
Although these regulations may seem unnecessarily convoluted, they are designed to protect women coming to America. At the same time, you should research national regulations regarding marriage brokers to stay out of trouble.
For example, international marriage services are outlawed in the Philippines, despite the country’s popularity in the mail-order bride market.
The potential risks and challenges of the mail order bride industry
Heartbreak is an inherent risk of any romantic relationship, but international dating comes with a host of unique challenges.
Here’s a list of potential risks you might face if you decide to buy a bride online:
- Online scam. In 2022, over 70,000 people lost their money to romance scammers, and their losses exceeded $1.3 billion, with a median loss of over $4,000 per person. Still, most scammers rely on the same tricks, so if you learn the red flags, you should be able to recognize the risk in time to avoid losing money. For example, offers to teach you cryptocurrency investment, send you a gift card, or request financial support are all likely signs of a scam.
- Fake profiles. They don’t merely use filters and effects to make photos more attractive. Instead, fake profiles steal personal information and images of real people to use as a front. Once you get interested in a fake profile, they can either try to steal your money, personal information, or intimate materials that can be used for blackmail. Luckily, a simple reverse image search is usually enough to learn if the person behind the profile is real. And most reputable dating sites require user verification via email, phone, or video upload, reducing the number of fake profiles.
- Gold diggers. Although financial reasons are no longer the main driver for mail-order brides, some girls may use a relationship with Western men to secure a stable lifestyle and support their families at home. Recognizing monetary motives online can be challenging, but once you meet in person, you should have no trouble identifying the true reasoning behind the girl’s desire to marry you.
One could argue that divorce is also a risk, but there’s no evidence that mail-order marriages are less stable and lasting than local families. So as long as you use common sense and due diligence, you should be safe.
Alternatives and options: Exploring other avenues for finding a partner
Half of single Americans use online dating to find potential partners, but there are other effective means of searching for love.
Here are a few typical examples:
- Meeting through mutual acquaintances. Before the pandemic, it was the most common way of meeting long-term partners and spouses for Americans. And although the popularity of this method dropped recently, it still accounts for roughly a third of all successful relationships in the US. Besides, the pool of potential partners can only expand as your social network grows.
- Dating on social media. Americans spend over 3 hours on social media daily, with Facebook and Instagram being the most popular platforms. So it’s only natural they try to use their time scrolling through the feed to find attractive users and potential romantic partners. This approach is less efficient than dedicated dating sites but still gaining popularity.
- Finding love via international travel. If you’re set on interracial marriage with a foreigner and using dating sites seems too impersonal, you can put vacation time to good use to travel, make new acquaintances, and potentially meet the love of your life. Obviously, this approach is the most time-consuming and costly, so it may work best for freelancers and people who often travel on business.
Other alternatives to online dating may include meeting through religious practices, school, or work. And meeting in bars and restaurants remains a staple of the American dating culture. Pick a bar in a Chinese, Korean, or Polish neighborhood, and you get a chance to meet foreign single ladies.
Conclusion: The future of mail order brides and societal attitudes towards them
First mail order brides came to America in the 1600s to help early settlers develop their colonies. The practice survived forced immigration, hostile social attitudes, and digitization to remain as popular as ever in the 21st century.
And reputable, user-friendly, international dating sites facilitate long-distance relationships and romance, helping thousands of foreign ladies entering the US to marry Americans every year. As online dating and globalization progress, we’re likely to see another surge in mail order bride popularity.
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